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My crazy friend's email

From: Eve
Email:
Remote Name: 24.116.87.108
Date: 11-Sep-2002
Time: 04:31 PM

Comments

I have been feeling a little down today and then I get this email. I have posted her email to me before on the weird things she gets into. This cracked me up. I have edited some of the laungage, she is quite colorful. I thought it might make someone smile. It cheered me up. She has been painting her floors...Here goes.

"Thank goodness I am trapped in the half of the house with the kitchen, lol!! But I HAVE to tell you my day has been anything but restful. As I started to paint the DR floor (yes, it's oil base paint) one of my feline furballs, walked right across the fresh paint and stood there shaking her paws everywhere. Good thing she was standing on the unpainted half, I grabbed her, wiped her feet and shut her in the bathroom, only to return to the DiningR to find yet ANOTHER furball with paint on his feet. So I shut him in the bathroom too and went back to painting. I finished the painting then took a break and found yet ANOTHER frickin feline furball standing in the LivingR with paint on her feet and tracking it on the new rug, AARRRGGG!! SO I RUN ALL THE WAY AROUND THE OUTSIDE OF MY HOUSE TO THE FRONT DOOR (I do not run, it is written right in my contract.) grab her and shut her in my daughter's bedroom. Ok, the rest of the frickin feline furballs are outside, no prob. Well I sat at the puter for a while, made some lunch, went outside, etc. All the time I could hear one of the FFFs in the bathroom complaining loudly about being shut in (well, it's his own dam fault, right?). So now it's 1:30pm, I painted the floor at 10 am and it is dry to the touch, the FFF's feet shouldn't stick anymore, so I open the bathroom door to let them out, when OMG!!!!! The frickin feline furballs have knocked all the potted plants off the window ledge into the tub, dirt is everywhere and to top it all off they S**T in them, and it STINKS! ARRRGHHH!! So I clean out the tub, throw the poo poo in the toliet, flush it and the toliet is clogged OMG WHERE IS THE PLUNGER?????? IT IS NOT IN THE BATHROOM. I CAN'T BELIEVE THIS IS HAPPENING TO ME. So I call the man with the "know how" (otherwise known as Darling Husband) and get his secretary who tells me he is with a client and would I like to leave a voice mail? Oh what the h*ll, sure, gimme the da*n voice mail. I leave message that goes something like this "D-- This is your wife, where the H*LL is the plunger? Call me back!"

I'll be he called he back. haha

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